As with other addictions, individuals may be very good at hiding behaviors, especially during the dating stage and before you may live together where secrets become more challenging to maintain.
Often people with sex addiction will be very defensive about their behavior. They can become increasingly hostile about any questions their partner or partner may have about their time, their interactions or the possible use of the internet to engage in addictive behavior.
However, just because a partner is secretive or defensive about themselves is not a direct correlation with sex addiction. An individual cheating with a committed partner or partner or someone cheating on her boyfriend or girlfriend is not necessarily a sex addict; there could be many different issues driving this type of behavior.
Some of the key signs to look for in any relationship that may indicate sex addiction include the following. It is important not to base these assumptions on a single event or incident but rather a pattern of behavior that damages relationships and is potentially risky for everyone involved.
Changes in Sexual Intimacy in Relationships
Most of the sex addicts tend to experience a decreased desire for sexual relations with their partners. It is very common for sex addicts to feel embarrassed about engaging in their addictive behavior and to transfer that shame to all sexual relationships, even those who are healthy and positive.
Additionally, like addiction, actions or thoughts around sex change and increase over time. For example, a sex addict may develop fantasies about sex in public places. It’s unlikely that she will talk to your partner about this, especially if the partner has rejected this suggestion in the past. Conversely, sex addicts will find other people to fulfill these fantasies, which then results in less sexual arousal in sexual relationships with partners that do not involve fantasies.
Problems at Work and with Money
As sex addiction develops and individuals spend more time indulging in fantasies either through watching pornography online or engaging in sex with other people, it is common for work problems to occur. People may be fired from jobs because of watching pornographic movies on the internet at work or because of poor job performance or missing days at work.
It is also common for individuals to experience financial problems. This is especially true if the partner leads a dual lifestyle or is involved in prostitution or any type of fetish activity.
Lying and Hiding
Addicts have a hard time keeping stories organized. They will often get caught up in a few lies about unrelated matters, but become increasingly angry, hostile and defensive when this is shown.
Another concern to watch out for is hiding internet or phone usage. Having a password on the phone, taking phone calls and texts only privately or even having multiple cell phones and devices withheld from a partner can also be signs of possible sex addiction /.
Often the partners in these relationships feel that something is “off” about the relationship. Some sex addicts will thrive on addiction while others may be able to maintain their secret lives for years. Ideally, talk to your partner and be specific and nonjudgmental about the recorded behavior, and then seek help from a therapist who specializes in sex addiction recovery.